The landscape brings me to tears
I search beneath the tears and find a mix of beautiful emotion
The grief is the heavy weight of existence
The love is its opposite lightness
And in between is a stillness
A calm
A balance
Where I find peace

This year is the first year of my entire life where the two extremes aren't at war with themselves
The first year of my life where I can stay calm and strong in the centre
Even when these two sides begin to bend
I can just watch them from this central point
Attentive
Alert
Motionless
Save a dip or a rise subtly felt in a sway of existential emotion
The result of this objective attention is an overwhelming feeling
Of love
Peace
And gratitude
Wrapped in humility

A Prayer to God
The Divine Eternal Energy of universal creation and destruction:

Who am I to be ungrateful?
Who am I to be resentful?
Who am I to be revengeful?
Who am I beneath these existential tears of joy and sadness?
Who am I?

When I answer this question I am unable to cast any stone

 

Gary Caganoff, 2005